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The Teal Chronicles

Tallisms: Tall Quotes & Questions

February 28th, 2013

Living tall is to be a giant among men. Many are curious what it is like to be tall and believe it is a better life.  Life is the same up here as it is down there, but we have a harder time finding clothes. The questions people ask tall people are a mixture of serious and ridiculous. After hearing the same questions over and over, I feel compelled to make t-shirts with all the answers to them so you do not have to suffer the verbal indignity. For those people who don’t know what questions tall people are asked on a daily basis, here is a taste for your pleasure.

Warm Regards,

Ed


 

Tallisms tall quote and questions Post #10 

Questions:

 

HOW TALL ARE YOU? (5 feet 30 inches)

 

DID YOU PLAY BASKETBALL? (No, did you play mini golf?)

 

ARE YOU SCARED TO LOOK DOWN? (Yes, its your face)

 

HOW IS THE WEATHER UP THERE? (Better than down there)

 

CAN YOU HEAR ME UP THERE? (Yes, I’m ignoring you)

 

DO YOU HAVE A HARD TIME FINDING CLOTHES? (Only if I go to where you shop)

 

CAN YOU REACH UP AND GET THAT FOR ME? (Yes, but I have first dibs)

 

CAN YOU GET OUT OF MY WAY, I CANNOT SEE THE TV? (Sure, it’s a lame show anyways)

 

HOW DID YOU GET SO TALL? (Bananas)

 

IS IT HARD TO BREATHE UP THERE? (Only when you smoke)

 

ARE YOU WEARING PLATFORM SHOES? (No, you just got smaller)

 

CAN YOU SLAM DUNK A BASKETBALL? (two hands blindfolded, can you?)

 

CAN YOU TOUCH THE CEILING? (Can you touch the floor?)

 

IS IT TRUE WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT TALL MEN WITH BIG FEET? (I don’t want to brag)

 

CAN YOU TELL ME IF YOU CAN SEE MY CHILD UP THERE? (No, can you help me pick up my spilt change)

 

CAN YOU PLEASE BEND DOWN SO I CAN TALK TO YOU? (How about  I pick you up?)

 

The answers to these questions are variable depending on your mood, but I think you get the idea of what Tall Men encounter daily.  With that in mind I wanted to leave some inspiration for the Tall achievers.

 

“IF YOU AREN’T IN OVER YOUR HEAD, HOW DO YOU KNOW HOW TALL YOU ARE?” 

-T.S. ELIOT

 

“JUST AS TALL TREES ARE KNOWN BY THERE SHADOWS, SO ARE GOOD MEN KNOWN BY THEIR ENEMIES”

-CHINESE PROVERB

 

STOOP AND YOU’LL BY STEPPED ON; STAND TALL AND YOU’LL BE SHOT AT”

-CARLOS A. URBIZO

 

“TALL TREES CATCH MUCH WIND”

-PROVERB

 

“YOU CAN STAND TALL WITHOUT STANDING ON SOMEONE. YOU CAN BE A VICTOR WITHOUT HAVING VICTIMS”

-HARRIET WOODS

 

“YOU HAVE TO DO YOUR OWN GROWING NO MATTER HOW TALL YOUR GRANDFATHER WAS.”

-ABRAHAM LINCOLN

 

“FOR A TREE TO BECOME TALL, IT MUST GROW TOUGH ROOTS AMONG THE ROCKS”

-FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE

  

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Tall Adventure: Married to the TEAL Man

February 21st, 2013

A decade ago I had no idea what life held in store for me. I had just met the man of my dreams: Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome. The bright side is that we have two kids and a happy home. The downside, which ultimately led to the launch of this business, is shopping for a tall man. Obviously clothes are the first thing you think of, but consider other items where size matters such as cars and furniture (I’ll delve into these in another post).

 

dictionary.com defines adventure as:

1. an exciting or very unusual experience

2. participation in exciting undertakings or enterprises: the spirit of adventure

3. a bold, usually risky undertaking; hazardous action of uncertain outcome

 

In my experience clothes shopping for a Tall Man is definition #3: a bold, usually risky undertaking; hazardous action of uncertain outcome. In general shopping for me has always been a thrill, a hunt, a sensory rich experience which always ends in a satisfied purchase. However, shopping for my Tall husband rips away all the pleasure I associate with the activity. I find I have to psych myself up, think optimistic thoughts, prepare for a long day and stay determined.

Whether we are shopping at stores or in cyber space, our routine and outcome are generally the same.  We go through store after store, nothing fits quite right, some items pass the “yeah it sort of fits if you don’t count the too short sleeves or the boxy too short length”, during the course of the day I have to shake off the defeat by stopping at one of my own favorite stores (a Tory Burch or Nordstrom will do) where I can satisfyingly fit anything off the rack. But then we’ll get back on course and continue the Tall clothes hunt. If we go into a normal store my husband will try on item after item that won’t fit in length. If we go to a Big and Tall store the length will fit great but he will swim in the shape of the clothes. They are all made for big and tall men, not one or the other. Seeing rack after rack of clothing, that your husband will never fit, is forever deflating.

I recently helped my husband on a quest to find a winter jacket. I have broken down our Tall Adventure into 3 Acts below. The results were surprisingly delightful.

Warm Regards,

Jenni 


 

Act I: The Problem

 

After relocating from California to Massachusetts, my husband decided he needed a real winter jacket. The jacket he currently has is faded black wool and fits him in the length but was meant for a man a lot rounder.  We optimistically set out to find a jacket in a store.

 

Act II: The Journey

 

Day 1 – Road Trip:

We drove to several stores: Coach Men, Barbour and Polo Ralph Lauren. He tried on jacket after jacket and they all almost fit.  We could have easily given in and made a purchase just to get something (we have done this before and the evidence still hangs unworn in the closet). At the end of the shopping adventure we were both frustrated, jacketless, but remained committed to finding something.

 

Day 2 – Cyberspace:

We decided to try a different tactic. No stores this time; instead we shopped online. We visited Banana Republic Big & Tall section, L.L. Bean, Patagonia and Lands’ End Big, Tall, Big & Tall. When we explored the Lands’ End site we liked what we saw but were weary of the description for the Tall section. It said for men between 6’1 – 6’3. Despite this we took a chance and purchased two jackets.

 

Act III: The Destination

 

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After a week the box arrived. This was the moment of truth.

 

 

 

 

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Here is jacket #1. It fits! The body is comfortable, overall and sleeve length is perfect.

 

 

 

 

 

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A true test of sleeve length and fit is what happens when you lift your arms

 

 

 

 

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Here is jacket #2. A grey herringbone wool jacket.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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And it FITS and passes the sleeve and overall length tests! 

 

 

 

 

 

My husband was so excited and exclaimed “Wow, the pockets are actually at the thigh instead of at my waist!”. I was shocked and couldn’t believe that all this time he’s been used to wearing jackets with pockets set at the wrong place! Another concession that Tall Men put up with.  Not only were we elated that both jackets fit, but also there would be no trip to the Post Office to return clothes. Incredible. A first. Thank you to Lands’ End Tall! 

 

It was worth the road trip across two state borders, time spent searching online and waiting for a week.   This destination is complete joy.

 

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Health and Wellness: Stretching

February 14th, 2013

A constant problem many Tall people have is back pain. Many of us are active individuals that work and play hard.  All of this wear and tear places a lot of pressure on our backs and at times gives us excruciating pain. The past few years, I have been troubled with recurring back pain that stemmed from many years of playing sports, in addition to sitting at my desk, plane, and car awkwardly. My posture is bad and I do not do enough to build my core or my back muscles to handle the stress of bending over to do everyday tasks (picking up my kids, shoveling snow, etc.). I recently went to a new physical therapist after I could not tolerate the pain any further and they provided me with an easy stretching cheat sheet to follow every day.

What I found out is that my hamstrings were tight and as a result they pulled on my back muscles which then caused pain. Solution: Stretch out the hamstring muscles and it will reduce the pulling on the back muscles. So far, by following these few stretches every day I have had no back pain and I am able to live a normal life. Pain is only in your mind until you cannot get off the floor.

Warm Regards,

Ed


 

CHEAT SHEET:  TALL MAN STRETCHES

 

 

hamstring stretch

 

1. Hamstring Stretch

Hold the stretch on each leg for 30 seconds, repeat 2-3 times. Then stretch both legs at the same time for 30 seconds, repeat 2-3 times.

 

 

 

 

butt stretch

2. Butt Stretch

Hold the stretch on each leg for 30 seconds, repeat 2-3 times.

 

 

 

 

hamstring door stretch NEW

 

3. Hamstring Door Stretch

Hold the stretch on each leg for 30 seconds, repeat 2-3 times.

 

 

 

 

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